Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Is It a dream

Music: I know a man, he's really awful nice. He isn't here.

So around the month of May until December last year, I've had the worst heartbreak ever. As you all might have known, if you ever read my past posts. Sorry by the way, for not posting as frequent because... well, you know, life. I'll get back to that later. So back to that heartbreak story, I think I might still have the residue of that tragedy in my mind. It was pretty rough. It happened pretty fast too.

I started to get to know him around November 2012 through this famous social photo app. And for some reason we just clicked. You know, like really enjoyed our little comments at each other's photos. So long story short, I started to really really really like this guy. I mean I've never even met him but based on what I read and saw, he sounded very interesting to me. I used to have this big silly grin whenever I saw the notification and I knew it's him. After that I couldn't stop thinking about him no matter how hard I tried. It's super crazy!  That was around our final examination week. So there I was, sitting for my exam whilst the thoughts of him running everywhere in my brain. Crazy! Truthfully I simply don't know what to call it. Is it love? I have no idea. All I know is that it's crazy.

So one fateful day, I discovered his friggin' Facebook. I don't really want to add him because I have not a single clue of who he is. He might be a psycho streaker for all I know. So I just let it rest. But then, he suddenly deleted his account on that famous social photo app and I remembered I was so disappointed and it hit me bad. So a day after that I decided to reach out and add him. It's funny because it took me hours to hit that friend's request button. I was really weighing out the pros and cons because once I click it, there's no turning back. But I hit it anyway. I was freaking out when he responded to it so fast. I don't really know what to say when he sent me a chat message. But I replied and the rest is history. I always enjoyed chatting with him. But at this point, I seriously needed a reality check. He has no clue how I felt and I can feel that he just wanna be friends. Not once did he showed any interest to be more than that with me. I even confessed right in his face but he just... Anyway, he was more interested in my friend than me. In fact he was more interested in everyone else other than me. So I gathered my broken heart and left. I cut off everything, facebook as well as the other social app. 
But he was still there somewhere, to this day. I was a mess at first, because it hurt so very bad. It gets better in time. I just deal with it. By blogging the sh*t outta it.   c:

Nah, I don't really worry because who reads this crap of a blog anymore. It's a dying art. Hiks.
Anyway I wish him luck in his future endeavors.